April 2025 Blog Prompt: Thoughts on Grief— The feeling of, the handling of.
Contributor of the prompt: *Margaret Dennis

Ever had a moment when things just align, and you are wondering what the deeper meaning of this alignment is?  Before I even dive into this topic, I want to share that I write a monthly blog for a client in Arizona.  This client always provides me with the topic to research and write on.  Guess what the client’s topic was for April?  If you guessed grief – you’d be correct! 

“How about writing about Grief and Grief Support….”  Is what the client sent via email.  This client is all about essential oils and aromatherapy.  I share that to say they are not in the business of ‘grief’ and or the processing of ‘grief’.

Thank you, Universe.  *Said a bit sarcastically.

Thoughts on Grief:

I have experienced grief (we all have). 

I have lost all my material possessions a few times over.  Grief!

I have lost loved ones.  Grief!

I have lost pets.  Grief!

I have lost clients.  Grief!

I have lost opportunities, and dare I say I have made mistakes and even felt grief over the errors I have made.  The remorse of why I didn’t know better and do better brings with it a feeling of grief. 

The Feeling of Grief:

Crazy enough to me grief is a reflective feeling.  I don’t feel it so much when looking forward, I feel it like crazy when looking back.  Sure, I wonder what tomorrow would be like had this person been here still or this pet be with me.  Sure, I wonder about this and that opportunity and how it would have shaped my tomorrow had it all come to happening.  But for me, grief is more felt when looking backwards, the memories, the moments, and maybe the not valuing or appreciating them to the fullest when I had them! 

The Handling of:

I’m going to reword this to say “The COPING of:” I am not sure I have handled my grief but boy oh boy some days I feel it has been handling me! 

Some days it so brings up, out of nowhere, a memory, a thought, a feeling.  Some days I feel something over a dang book I use to own, a plant I had, a pet.  Some days a picture can bring with it a flood of memories, moments and sadness – sadness that the time has past, and that experience is now gone.  I’ve worked to reframe the mind into seeing those moments flying in as a reminder of some great things – and I should be thankful for the retention of those moments in memory. 

Have I handed all my pet losses?  No.  I have reframed them into being remembered as
I loved those pets more than many humans love their pets and they had a great life with me as family.

Have I handled the losses my detainment brought me and frankly continues to bring me?  No.  I am aware of the grief.  I feel the grief.  I honor the grief. 

Maybe that is a great conclusion – I honor the grief.  I am aware of it and I am aware that it represents a loss and had I never ‘had’ I would never experience loss… so I’m thankful that at one point in my life I ‘had’.

My thoughts….